My apologies to the 2 people who might read these writings…but mainly to myself, for taking such a break from writing.  Not that I’ve stopped thinking about life daily beyond the surface, but there is something that comes from putting those thoughts into words in the open, that causes something to happen beyond what normally would.  Anyways, here’s “wassup”.

Currently I’ve begun reading “The Courage to Teach” by Parker Palmer.  The book was recommended to me via Pastor Boone, where most of my reading is recommended.  I didn’t know what to think, honestly, even up until beginning the book this morning.  After completing the first chapter, however, I’ve discovered this book speaks more to me than many “pastoral” reading selections that speak to only the surface of the pastor. 

Chapter one is titled, “Teaching From Within'”, written under the main premise that we teach who we are.  This has several ramifications, and I could never do the thoughts justice, but I will say a few things that were brought to light.  The things Palmer discusses not only affect the teacher who reads this book, but myself as a preacher/teacher/pastor/etc. person.  I preach/teach/pastor from within.  The inner realm of myself is what everything I do comes from, everything I do faithfully at least.  The preaching/teaching/pastoring I do from books I’ve read, or from the surface of responding to outside expectations placed on me….is neither good or faithful to the calling I’ve recieved.  Speaking to this level of myself, not that all of this is completely new or had never been thought of, but very important to remember, but impacts everything done for a preaching/teaching/pastoring reason greatly. 

It’d be neat even if that much was all that was gained.  But it goes further.  I’m not my occupation.  I’m a person, created/designed/called by God to be/become “Chadwick” daily.  Doing this on the surface would be easy, but not completely faithful.  To be faithful, this “becoming” must come from all the way into the depths of my inner self.  Not just in the workplace, or “doing what I do”, but “being who I am”.

As far as short-term realizations….this has done a lot to remind me that these things are important.  Setting aside time daily to think.  To read.  To open my mind/spirit to developing something deeper.  To do this at the beginning of the day, realizing that my day is influenced by its beginnings.  When I’ve completed a couple hours of reading/reflecting about life….I’m a much more “whole” person, than having entered the day straight from the shower.  My perspective on people/life is much more optimistic and loving, and there is a hope.  My existence today has purpose, and I’ve contemplated that purpose today.  Lord, help me to remember to do this more often.  Amen.