Author: Wick

Husband, Father, Pastor, Missionary, Writer, Poet, Friend, reader, coffee enthusiast, hockey Wing-Nut, musical participator, etc...
Posted in Different Learning, Different Scriptures

soft-headed.

Posted on by Wick

“Do not conform any longer to the patterns of the world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind…” Romans 12:2a

While reading Dr.Leman’s recent book, I was struck again by the research that says “who a child is, is fairly done developing by the time they’re 6 years old.”  He mentions it in his book, as an encouragement to parents to make sacrifices as necessary to be home with your children until they’re at least 6.  To give them a foundation of relationship and security found in time with mommy and/or daddy.

But what about parents of 7 year olds?  Or parents of teenagers?  Or parents themselves who would like to change their natural inclinations?

Often I’ll be reading a parenting book of some sort, and think to myself “Man, I’m glad I’m reading this now.  I can’t imagine not discovering this until my kids were 12+.”

Not that I’m advocating waiting.  But I would like to remind us of a hope found all throughout scripture.

The hope of neurological plasticity. 🙂

Simply put, neurologists agree that our brains and how they are wired can be changed, no matter what age we are.  (see “The Shallows” for more on this topic.)  No matter how long we’ve developed habits/patterns of behavior.  No matter how synapses are currently firing.  It may not be a “switch” we can flip easily, but we can still slowly rebuild and retrain our minds toward a completely new way of being/thinking.

Paul writes the same thing to the church in Rome in the verse above.  This isn’t a “mind made new” that we experience at the Resurrection someday.  This is a “made newing” that happens here and now, as God literally desires and is involved in transforming who we are.

So as we train our children, and smile because we’re so glad they’re getting a great start….may we not think the door to having a mind made new is only open to them.  Maybe you deal with anxiety, depression, lust, anger, jealousy, etc…whatever.  God is about transforming us by the “made newing” of our minds.  Scientists agree that our brains can be rewired, and rebuilt in new directions of synapse activity.  And that’s without allowing for the power of the Holy Spirit!!

Bring your brain before God in prayer today, that He might renew/transform how you think.  It may take time and practice, but we have a hope in Christ that we’re doing more than forming a “habit of holiness”.  Who we are is literally being transformed. 🙂

 

 

Posted in Uncategorized

off the wheel and out of bricks…

Posted on by Wick

Have you ever had a moment/season where it seems several messages are all coming to you at once from different directions, all saying the same thing?

I’m just about finished reading Dr. Kevin Leman’s book “It’s Your Kid not a gerbil”, and I definitely recommend it. Especially if you’ve not read anything by him before, it’s incredible stuff. But even if you’ve read all his previous books, this one is a great read. At some points, you get the feeling “I’ve heard this before”, because each time he’s saying a similar concept in a slightly different way. You definitely get the message by the end of the book. Parenting young children, especially during their first 6 years, is worth all sorts of sacrifices to have time/energy to building relationships with them, and developing their character/instilling a love for God.

We definitely live in a world where that is not seen as a priority. As adults, we’re pressured to make sacrifices to “get ahead” financially, so that we can build a solid foundation for our future family. Working extra hours are applauded/often required, and missing out on family time today is seen as worth-while for the vague notion of hog-tying a better tomorrow. As parents, we can be pressured just as much to focus on comparing our children to all the children around them. As seen in the most recent issue of “Parenting” magazine, our culture is not a great guide for what matters most:

As Dr.Leman says in his book, “Intellect is a wonderful thing, but being smart can get your child in jail as easily as it can get him or her into MIT.”

This past weekend, my wife and I were able to hear Free Methodist Bishop David Roller do some storytelling. Part of his story involved Moses, and God’s people doing the work of Egypt’s brick-makers. Part of the role of Moses, was to announce that the people of God were intended to do much more things than build the bricks for the Egyptian Empire.

One of the greatest things we can do for our children, especially during these younger years, is to raise them differently than the world suggests. To let go of pressure to raise them into the next incredible brick-makers for whatever empire will pay them enough. To announce by how we raise our children, that there are more important things than clocking in and out, inventing the next big thing, or rising to an athletic/talent star.  To not only guide them that direction, but to model it to them as well.

More important things like loving, and knowing they are loved. Like becoming a young man or woman of character, and reflecting the goodness of God to His creation/children. Like receiving their eternal identity as children of God. Like soaking in every possible moment with mommy and daddy, and knowing mommy and daddy are soaking those moments in as well. Every day that passes will change how our children are held by us.

May we each find new ways to get our family off the wheel this week…to become more than just brick-makers for an Empire they were not born for…:)