Category: Different Learning

“Do not conform any longer to the patterns of the world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind…” Romans 12:2a

While reading Dr.Leman’s recent book, I was struck again by the research that says “who a child is, is fairly done developing by the time they’re 6 years old.”  He mentions it in his book, as an encouragement to parents to make sacrifices as necessary to be home with your children until they’re at least 6.  To give them a foundation of relationship and security found in time with mommy and/or daddy.

But what about parents of 7 year olds?  Or parents of teenagers?  Or parents themselves who would like to change their natural inclinations?

Often I’ll be reading a parenting book of some sort, and think to myself “Man, I’m glad I’m reading this now.  I can’t imagine not discovering this until my kids were 12+.”

Not that I’m advocating waiting.  But I would like to remind us of a hope found all throughout scripture.

The hope of neurological plasticity. 🙂

Simply put, neurologists agree that our brains and how they are wired can be changed, no matter what age we are.  (see “The Shallows” for more on this topic.)  No matter how long we’ve developed habits/patterns of behavior.  No matter how synapses are currently firing.  It may not be a “switch” we can flip easily, but we can still slowly rebuild and retrain our minds toward a completely new way of being/thinking.

Paul writes the same thing to the church in Rome in the verse above.  This isn’t a “mind made new” that we experience at the Resurrection someday.  This is a “made newing” that happens here and now, as God literally desires and is involved in transforming who we are.

So as we train our children, and smile because we’re so glad they’re getting a great start….may we not think the door to having a mind made new is only open to them.  Maybe you deal with anxiety, depression, lust, anger, jealousy, etc…whatever.  God is about transforming us by the “made newing” of our minds.  Scientists agree that our brains can be rewired, and rebuilt in new directions of synapse activity.  And that’s without allowing for the power of the Holy Spirit!!

Bring your brain before God in prayer today, that He might renew/transform how you think.  It may take time and practice, but we have a hope in Christ that we’re doing more than forming a “habit of holiness”.  Who we are is literally being transformed. 🙂

 

 

This past week, our church began 120 days of intensive “returning to prayer” in our homes.  The goal is not simply to bless our meals, although that will be done.  It is not to make a list of requests and burn through them, although that might be done also.  As parents we wonder how to “pass on” our faith to our children and their children in a way that isn’t simply “teaching them doctrine, and how to nod in approval to it”.

Prayer is one of the main streams of faith in which Christ flows to our children, grandchildren, and beyond.

But what if we don’t know how to pray ourselves?  How much prayer is “enough” to make a difference?  If we start praying regularly now, won’t we/they feel hypocritical?

The answers are more simple than we may guess.  Jesus actually gives us a prayer himself (Matthew 6:9-13) and there are many Psalms available.  Beyond that, it’s okay to grow in our ability to pray…start where you are.  As for “enough”, we’ll get to that.  As for hypocritical, we need to get over our fear of being labeled “hypocrite”.

All Christians will be labeled “hypocrite” on their journey, hopefully. The Greek word “ὑποκρίνομαι” (hupokrinomai) literally means “play-acting”, and comes from the words “under” and “decide”. Actors are unable to decide for themselves in a play, because they are acting out a role.

At some point, Christ transforms us, and we begin to act out the new role He has given us. For a while, it may feel un-natural, like we’re acting. But as God transforms our nature, we find ourselves speaking the language of His Kingdom more naturally.

So how much prayer is “enough”? I doubt we can ever pray “too much”. 1 Thess. 5:17 reminds us “Pray Continually.” But our church has stolen (with permission) the “7-5-2” concept as a great place to start.  It means each week we commit to praying at least:

7 – times a week FOR our families, on our own.  Anyone can do this.  Whether you’re a parent, grandparent, aunt, uncle, cousin living by yourself, whatever.  You have family and people you love that you can pray for.

5 – times a week WITH our families.  This includes meal times and bedtimes.  Yes, even grandparents.  With phones, internet, e-mails, texting, etc…it’s completely possible to connect with someone in your family 5 times a week to let them know you’re praying with them.

2 – times a week WITH/FOR our spouses or someone close.  Sharing requests and our hearts.  For single people, or widows, or divorced parents, this may be harder.  But not impossible.  Find someone you are close to (if you’re married, it’s your spouse!!), and share prayer requests and hold one another in prayer at least twice a week.  This may be the most challenging, if prayer is not yet an assumed pattern in your home.  But this is WORTH it!!!

Maybe you hear that and gasp, for such a small amount of prayer.  Good. 🙂  But for the majority of homes, statistics indicate this would be an increase of prayer, and we believe God can do some great things in our midst through these commitments to prayer.