Tag: adoption

Posted in Adoption Journey, Different Moments, Different Scriptures

Oh, be quiet Larry…

Posted on by Wick

I remember back in late high school or early college:  There was this short Christian classic on sale or clearance or something and I wanted to get it.  A small part actually wanting to be the kind of person to read such books, and a larger part wanting to seem to be the kind of person to read such books, I snagged it.  I read through it a bit.  I smiled.  I even understood a few sentences.

In college, it was mentioned here and there.  I knew the topic vaguely, and smiled and nodded whenever someone mentioned it in conversation.  Yes, that is quite a good book.  Yes, I do so enjoy practicing the presence of God, just like Brother Lawrence did in “Practicing the Presence of God”.  Whether doing the dishes (as he did) or other menial tasks that my day to day existence brings me, I love the fact that Christ always offers to be very near.  God truly is with us, closer than we often realize.

I was a bit surprised then, when reading the book more closely for my current course on Spiritual Formation, to find so larrymuch in the book I didn’t like.  When the author writes Brother Lawrence (let’s call him Larry) to tell him of a friend who loses a close friend to death, Larry tells him to advise his friend to use these moments to his advantage.  “What a great opportunity to give the part of your heart previously given to your friend back to God where it belongs!”, he seems to say.  Or when the author himself is aging and enduring intense suffering of some sort, Larry refuses to pray his suffering would be taken away.  Instead, Larry insists on praying that God would strengthen the author to endure the suffering that is most likely God’s way of refining his heart and soul.  No, I do not like this guy much at all.  I don’t think I would have written him as much as the author seemed to.  A man who neurotically spent at least 10 years of his life anxious that he shouldn’t be distracted in thought or feeling by anything that might take God’s place, finally ending up with peace (albeit alone, and without much pleasure it would seem beyond the “presence of God”).  No, I do not like this guy much at all.

Yet…I can appreciate his heart.  A heart that yearns for the presence of God so much that everything else – even the extremely important things in life – melt away.  An experience of God’s presence, even in suffering alone, that gives him a sense of complete and udder wholeness that so many empty people in our world are hungry for.

I’ll admit, wrestling with his message comes at a poignant time.  Last week was the final week of Lent.  The season of preparing for Easter.  It was also a week of waiting for an important update in terms of our adoption.  This journey that has taken over 3 years, it finally feels like our boat has spotted land.  So it takes a bit of humility to confess that I, a pastor who was allowed to even baptize several people this morning, was distracted most of my week by checking my e-mail for an update that never came.  That dotting my week of anticipating the resurrection of Jesus Christ, I was experiencing the brokenness of a human whose heart is not at complete peace in this broken world.

Part of me realizes that’s probably okay.   Jesus was certainly not often “at peace” in this world.  Another part of me realizes, there’s something to all this stuff Larry was talking about.

But before you or I go out and leave our family, secluding ourselves in monasteries away from our spouses and children, aiming to live like Larry and push away anything that threatens to occupy a place in our hearts – I don’t think that is required.   But we can be reminded in powerful ways, the truths found in Scriptures like 1 Corinthians 15.  That Jesus died and was resurrected.  The truth of this powerful statement impacts us as individuals, and puts every anxious thought, every deep-seated need/emotion, and every well-intentioned prayer in a wonderfully redemptive context.

The Truth of a resurrected Jesus Christ releases us from serving the state of our situations.  Even though there are times (like this past week, and probably again in the future) we don’t want to hear it, the words of Brother Lawrence come as important reminders: Even really important and good things are not “foundational” the way Christ and His resurrection are.  We can have Peace, even in the midst of needing peace.  That is something the world considers foolish.   That is something scripture considers faith.

That is something my daughters need from their father.  Something my wife needs from her husband.  And so, not as an individual but as a family – we work to shape our heart to seek pleasure only in the things that please God.  We seek to walk with Him as the center of our being.  We confess that this is not an easy road, and we sometimes lose focus.  But we return to this walk and practice – together.

(and really really pray that our boat would draw a big step closer to “land” this week) 🙂

Posted in Adoption Journey

Reaching out, again…

Posted on by Wick

Okay friends & family, it’s finally that time again.  I can’t give all the details in a public post, but if you’d like to know more please give me a call.  (And no, in case you’re trolling here, we’re not preparing to go around the DRC Government in ANY way.   We love and respect the people of hte DRC, and look forward to a life of our family being invested in their future.)  In any case, we’ve hit a point in our adoption where we need to raise more funds.

Yes, the country is still not issuing “Exit Letters”, until new laws/processes are in place to better protect the children.  We are continuing to move forward within the country, through the parts of the process still allowed, believing that we want to be as ready as possible when those doors open once again.  This also means providing for her care in the meantime.7a5b3-andersonst-louis2011384

Even in the midst of significant wait and what seems to be a hopeless road, there have been great steps moving toward us bringing home this child we’ve been praying over 2 years for.  We are so thankful for the generosity and prayers of so many of you.  We’ve even added something new for your fundraising enjoyment!!

1. Wick’s BandCamp Page –  Trying something new!   Here you will be able to buy individual spoken words, as well as a couple songs I threw on there for fun.  100% of every dollar goes toward our adoption fund!   I’ve plenty more spoken words that will eventually be uploaded if ya’ll like these.  If I only sell a couple, I’ll just tell my mom thanks and move on.  🙂

2.  Amazon Books – Both my self-published parenting book and the Children’s Book we created with our kids are available for digital purchase on Amazon.com.   A large chunk of every sale comes right to me, and goes directly into our adoption fund!

3. Giving through “Both Hands” – Since the very beginning with our first service project, they’ve been our most popular method of giving/receiving funds for this adoption.  Donations are tax deductible, and you can mail them a check or simply give online!!

As you’re preparing for the Holidays, we hope & pray you’ll consider one of these options. Even in place of sending us a Christmas card, just download an mp3 and send me a video of you laughing at it. 🙂  Or in place of a gift, throw a few bucks out to “Both Hands”, and e-mail me a Merry Christmas.  But above all, please continue to pray.  Not just for our family or our children, but pray for the entire DRC.  Pray for their government and their leaders, as their senate continues to meet.  Pray for the areas where rebels continue to break out in fighting.  Pray for those who are overlooked in the shuffle and quest for power and influence.  Pray for the stability and future of these beautiful people, and the preservation of their rich heritage in the midst of a world that is realizing more and more, the value of their nation.

Posted in Adoption Journey

Open Letter to DRC President Joseph Kabila

Posted on by Wick

Your Excellency,

We don’t know each other.  I could never understand all that you’ve been through, or all the weight that you currently carry as leader of the Democratic Republic of the Congo.  You and I have both made mistakes.  Because of your position and influence, when you make a mistake, its’ impact is large.  But we are both fallible.  Our strength comes not as we deny this, but as we humble ourselves and accept help/guidance from others.  As Desmond Tutu said,

“..You can’t exist as a human being in isolation. It speaks about our interconnectedness. You can’t be human all by yourself, and when you have this quality – Ubuntu – you are known for your generosity.  We think of ourselves far too frequently as just individuals, separated from one another, whereas you are connected and what you do affects the whole World. When you do well, it spreads out; it is for the whole of humanity.”

I’ll be honest, I have a selfish motivation even in writing to you.  My family is pursuing an adoption of a child from the DRC that began years ago.  We would love to bring her home.  But even as I write this, there are families who are responding to your country and your authority with disrespect and malice.  I want to apologize for their actions and their words.  In regards to international adoption, we must not sacrifice the future protection of children and sustainable family-life for immediate homecomings of those being processed.  I understand that you and many others would be upset by what seems to be a lack of respect.  It seems many are more interested in forcing or coercing your hand to “bring home” children, rather than offer whatever assistance/wisdom we can toward reforming the systems in place for taking care of the future generations of Congolese.  The “best case scenario” is not to figure out how to do adoptions well.  The “best case scenario” involves healing the land, people, and systems so that the DRC can flourish and be the beautiful nation and people it has the potential to be.

I know you have a lot on your plate.  Even as great things are accomplished for women’s rights  in the Senate and your soccer team is competing, MONUSCO looks toward new action against the FDLR.  The conflict that continues in Eastern Congo is only a small part of the struggle your people have faced for over half a century, and even longer.  As so many in the world have valued their own desires, and sought to fill their own bank accounts and resources, the people of your nation were not only trampled on and stolen from, but they were learning a way of existence.  The way of existence that declares, “I look out for myself, no one else.”  Generations have come and built lives on this approach, and so there has been war, rape, murder, and worse.  Children are not allowed to be children, as parents are forced to sacrifice them to survive.  When children cannot trust their parents, there cannot be family.  When “family” is lost, so too are communities and eventually, nations.

I don’t speak all of these things from a nation that “has it all correct”.  As you have probably seen, the United States has its’ own struggles.  We too have built on generations declaring “I look out for myself, no one else.”  Our conflict may not be as visible, but it is having an impact on “family”, and therefore also, our nation.  From what I’ve read, you believe in Jesus Christ and in the Bible as the Word of God.  I’m appealing to you, therefore, not as someone who has much to offer you.  But as a brother in Christ.

Christ calls us to humble ourselves, to admit our faults and seek redemption.  As I began my letter I pointed out that when you make a mistake, the impact is large because of your power and position.  The opposite can also be true!  When you humble yourself and seek the redemption of what God intends for you and for your nation – it has incredible potential to transform the world both now and for the future!!  You’re in a unique position right now to bring reform, and not only speak words but put into action, plans and resources to transform and protect the future children of the DRC.  Imagine a future where your daughter, Sifa, whose name means “reputation/praise”, can proudly share who her father was, and point out the legacy you helped leave behind.  That even though you made mistakes when you were young and seeking power in a country where everyone was doing the same thing – you came to a point where you realized those errors, and were transformed.  That is the Good news of the Gospel message.  Lives like yours and mine, Jesus came to bring freedom from our sin, and redemption/new life through us for the sake of the world!

I know many voices are calling simply for you to “open the doors” and allow adopted children to go home.  As beautiful as that would be for so many families, it would also land your nation right where it was when this all began.  There is corruption, and changes need to happen.  You’ve already stated that publicly, but nothing concrete has been seen yet.  I encourage you, to put together a team to examine and reform the adoption process in the DRC.  Invite leaders from several nations where families are thriving, and figure out a long-term plan for the future of your people in the context of a global community.  Figure out what investments are being made in the economy of your nation, and what those investors are seeking to gain.  You have hundreds of families from all over the world, waiting to be forever connected with the DRC through their children!  What a great resource to tap into, and to invite into life-long relationships with!  As the country eventually opens, invite these parents to stay connected, and encourage partnerships with the local communities their children are adopted from.  Help develop structures and accountability so that such partnerships remain healthy and not yet another “I’ll get mine” enterprise.  Set a goal, not of simply serving the orphaned of today, but of healing the families and communities of your nation so that if and when orphans exist – the community and resources are there to provide homes and families for those children.

Allow your people to experience the beginning of needed healing, by publicly declaring you will not alter the constitution or seek another term in office.  Your country needs more than you, and more than any individual leader has to offer.  Lead them into an existence that declares “Ubuntu” once again.  Help them find a leader who can guide them into this next season of healing and redemption of family.

And someday, when you’re no longer carrying the weight and responsibility you carry, and you have some free time, I’d love to meet you.  To have my daughters meet yours.  To have our wives drink tea together.  To sing together, a song of worship to the God who offers to transform us both for the sake of a world that needs us to bear His image.

Thanks for your time,

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I’ll admit, this is probably a bit starry-eyed and will probably never be read by the President of the DRC….but it helps me to pray better.  Not simply for my daughter, whom I hope to hold someday.  But for her friends, her commune, her nation, and the future of the DRC that Jesus declares there is hope for.  And I believe Him…