Posted in Uncategorized

a flat story.

Long ago, in a world covered completely in maple trees, a thought was thought. This thought was one of the most powerful thoughts ever known to man, but it couldn’t be contained in a single mind, and so it was shared. In those days, there was a serious problem that was growing more and more urgent every day. Gravity was growing more powerful.

Every day brought new stories of how the increased gravitational pull was impacting this world and it’s inhabitants. Birds were now walking around on the ground, causing massive disturbances in traffic flows as they didn’t know how to use common cross-walks. Baseball fields were forced to shrink the size of the playing field, as the ball wouldn’t go nearly as far as it used to. Elevator cables made strange noises, and weary people began getting healthier as they were forced to use the stairs on a regular basis.

But one thing that began happening without much notice — were the cakes. Only slightly at first, but over time it became more and more noticeable. Cakes were not rising. No matter how many eggs were added, or how fluffy the batter seemed; as a cake was baking in the oven, gravity pulled at it to the point of become simply a flat cake. Not much taller than a shallow pan.

Well you can imagine the chaos that ensued. No one wanted a flat cake. It was too difficult to get the perfect “frosting to cake” ratio once the cake became deflated. It was always either too rich, or not enough. Birthdays were lost to tragic fits of childish rage. Parties began to be things of the past, as too many embarrassed mothers saw a flat cake as their own personal defeated attempt at motherhood.

That is, until one woman saw an opportunity to change the world.

It was, after all, a special occasion. Her daughters’ birthday. Her daughter, Phoebe, deserved to be celebrated by everyone. Her mother loved her with a love unparallelled in any other stories illustrating motherhood. She was special, and the world deserved to know why. But her mom knew this would only happen by solving the problem of the flat cakes.

That’s when it hit her. Maple.

As a child, she’d read an ancient story about a people at the beginning of time who’d purposefully planted maple trees all over their planet. How this tree that literally “bleeds sugar” could be used to do great things for humanity. She labored intensely to brainstorm the perfect combination until finally she emerged triumphantly from her kitchen, yelling to the world, “I’ve done it!!!” (Which also happens to be the phrase engraved underneath the giant statue of a Shortstack on that same planet, if you ever happen to visit.)

Sure enough, not only had she solved the problem, but she had done it in such a way that these flat cakes covered in pancakessugary maple syrup have become a staple. A meal to be eaten all year long, in celebration of the girl who inspired it all. Phoebe.

And now through circumstances that are hard to explain in a Craigslist ad – God has not only allowed us to know of this amazing recipe, but has also given us a sweet little girl named Phoebe to bring home from Africa. The problem is….it cost about as much as traveling to Planet Shortstack to adopt a daughter from Africa. Thankfully, God has been providing so far, and will continue to. We hope that you will consider coming to celebrate this incredible little girl (our Phoebe, not the fictional Phoebe from the silly story), and help us raise money to bring her home — one plate at a time.

Details: Help us raise money to bring our daughter home from the Democratic Republic of Congo (DRC) in Africa. We hope to travel in 9-12 months. We’ve paid over $14,000 already as God has provided….and are trusting Him for the other $17,000!!!!

7:30am — 11am
Moundford Free Methodist Church — 1803 E. Mound Rd (Next to LSA)
Breakfast — Pancakes & Sausage, Drinks

Adults – $8/plate
Kids – $4/plate
Kids 5 & under — Free

Espresso Drinks – $3

TELL YOUR FRIENDS! Join the event on Facebook!



Husband, Father, Pastor, Missionary, Writer, Poet, Friend, reader, coffee enthusiast, hockey Wing-Nut, musical participator, etc...

One thought on “a flat story.

any thoughts?

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s