Author: Wick

I’ve begun reading “Best American Nonrequired Reading 2009” edited by David Eggars, for fun recently . Probably not the best book to be reading on an airplane, as the cover depicts a grandmother reading her granddaughter a gun magazine, and with chapters like “The Ticking is the Bomb”, it just feels iffy.

It includes an assortment of different types of published works from various sources throughout 2008. Foreign comics, essays, short stories, and other brief works from all sorts of publications, compile what has been a pretty great read thus far. I look forward to more.

One of the entries, from the Paris Review, “Diary of a Fire Lookout”, by Philip Connors, made me compare what often happens in ministry to his summer employment. During the summer months, at the Gila National Forest, in New Mexico, he looks out a giant tower and spots plumes of smoke, reporting them to the Forest patrols, etc.

One thing he points out, is that most often they don’t actually DO anything in response to the fires. They announce what is happening. They keep tabs on it. Sometimes they even fly someone in for a better look to assess what is going on, and how large the fire is. But usually it’s allowed to simply burn its course, being surrounded by so much open land. This is for good reasons, and he explains them well.

In ministry, we are often the “Fire Lookout”. Both in a negative (things going wrong) sense, and in a positive (Holy Spirit moving) sense. It can be easy for us to feel like our job (not just pastors, but followers of Christ) is to point out and announce what is happening. We keep tabs on it. Sometimes we even do something unique to get a better look and assess what is going on. But how often do we interact with it? Get our hands scarred a bit by our proximity to the flame?

May we not only announce the plumes of smoke we see rising in the Kingdom around us….but may we get our hands dirty and singe our eyebrows by being active where God can utilize us in very important ways….

At some point, the myth of God having “one person in store for me”, whom I had to find or life would never work out right faded. Which may sound like an odd way to begin a blog, just after spending a week rekindling my relationship with my spouse, but allow me to explain.

Because of letting go of such a “romantic” notion that my wife was the one and only person in the universe God intended for me to spend life with, I think there was an aspect of our relationship I’ve never quite appreciated. The aspect that once my wife and I chose each other, and took the vows of marriage – we chose to become “the one” to each other. Which connects us to Adam and Eve in some pretty important ways.

The fact that God saw Adam, and thought “It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper as his partner.” Genesis 2:18

To be as thankful for my wife, as Adam was for Eve. To view her as a gift from God. To receive her as the divine gift that she is. To relate to her as God’s completion to what he began in me. I think these are aspects of our relationship I’ve not really spent much time dwelling on.

In the midst of counseling/praying with countless young men who are trying to find “the one” God has for them, I’ve focused on how much of this process is a CHOICE. It’s not a Disney fairy tale. The world emphasizes to “Marry the one you Love”, but the Bible directs us to “love the one you marry”. (quote from Weekend to Remember)

But in the midst of focusing on reason, and choice, and the atmosphere of it being less something we “fall into”, and more something we consciously move toward on purpose – I’ve moved away from Adam receiving Eve. I don’t think I’m alone.

In a world that is fast learning that the real world is a far cry from Cinderella’s neck of the woods (i.e. “Enchanted“), we have many who view marriage as an economic partnership. This happens even among those of us who believe God has created and blessed this human endeavor with echoes of the Divine.

It’s something that will and has taken humility to admit. But I thank God for my wife, and my prayer is that I will continue to receive her the way Adam received Eve, “..this at last is bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh;” – Genesis 2:23

I love it.

My wife and I were able to spend this weekend at “Weekend to Remember” by FamilyLife. I have to say, it was well worth the time. Thanks to great family offering free babysitting, and getting our tax return in time to pay for the hotel/food, and free registration scholarship for being in ministry – it worked out well.
I was a bit skeptical, at first. I envisioned lots of “men lead the family, hunt, grunt, and still need to cry in front of their wives”. Or even “marriages need lots more Jesus, and that’s about it”.

Thankfully, it was neither.

What it ends up being is some pretty good reminders about being purposefully in love with your spouse. About putting effort into not only maintaining that purpose, but growing in the experience of it as well. And all of it offered up as an act of worship to the God who made such a relationship possible.

Sure, there were cheesy jokes. There were times I’d make fun of myself for being there. There was even a movie clip from “Fireproof” used. But even with these things, the time spent and discussion prompts provided, and atmosphere of sending couples away with “projects” together….was very good for our marriage.

Not so incredible would be the “Poms” competition that seems to be taking place in the room directly next to ours. Seriously, I think the entire team is staying in one room, and as I type they’re playing the music and stomping like teenage female elephants. It’s great for a quiet, relaxing, final night at the Pere Marquette. 🙂

But all in all, I’d definitely recommend this to any married, engaged, or remarried couple. The seminars are good, the resources are inexpensive, the discussion prompts are great. But most of all, to spend a weekend communicating with your spouse on purpose, toward a future of receiving each other.And if you’re ever doing a “date night” in Peoria, IL – I recommend Water Street Wines Cafe & Coffees. Call ahead for reservations, and give yourselves at least 2 hours for your dining experience. They don’t have meat fondue, but it’s more than a complete meal to enjoy the cheese fondue with an Aztec chocolate fondue for dessert. We also added the creme brulee (3 flavors!) as a dessert companion…..holy cow. 🙂 All the food & coffee was ridiculously good. Add to that it’s small size, brick walls, and pillows on the bench atmosphere….and you got yourself a relaxing date night.

So there you have it. Definitely a “Weekend to Remember”, as advertised.