Category: Uncategorized

There’s an aspect to the whole “growing up” thing that I believe we can embrace in an important way.

It may just be me, but it seems like as I was going through my teen/college years, I viewed marriage and family as a way of moving up a life-ladder of some sort.  “Achieving”, and adding more weight to the bucket of my identity or importance in some ways.  Some of that is true.  When my wife and I were married almost 10 years ago, I became half of an inter-dependent relationship.  The children we’ve brought into the world since then, depend on us for their livelihood.

Especially as we move toward an international adoption, there’s an opportunity and temptation to further inflate my sense of self-importance and pride.

Or, there’s another aspect to all of this.  The increased ability to be humiliated. 🙂

It’s a bit of Christianity we don’t talk about a ton, but it’s there all the time if we’re willing to let ourselves acknowledge it.  God calls us to be humble.  Not only to “be” humble, but to perform the action of “humbling ourselves”.  As in James 4:10, “Humble yourselves before the Lord, and He will lift you up.”  But what we don’t like to realize, is that often the path to increased humility is traveling the road of humiliation.  Our pastor reminds us often, and I like it…even if I’m not always a fan of humiliation in the moment.

Opening ourselves up to a marriage relationship can be a rewardingly humiliating experience.  No other place in life do we enjoy the amount of vulnerability and openness a covenant relationship of marriage can offer.  I’m not simply talking about the obvious areas, like growing old and seeing each other at our worst.  My wife has seen me snotty/stuffy, she’s seen me miserably recovering from a tonsillectomy, and endured me passing out on the ER floor.  (and those are quite clean compared to the stuff I won’t share here)  But there’s more.  She knows my heart.  Admittedly, I can be a reserved person emotionally.  But if there’s one person I can share my most humiliating bits with…the times I feel down, or like a failure…it’s my wife who I can turn to, and be held by.  And so, building our relationship and strengthening my marriage – continues to lead me deeper down this path of humility.  Even if it means I’m humiliated in front of the woman who has committed to loving me no matter how humble I may get. 🙂

Now on top of that incredible and humiliating existence, add the aspect of parenting.  Bringing forth tiny versions of ourselves, who end up becoming living breathing reflections of who we are.  Tiny little mirrors walking around, pointing out to us and amplifying anything we may do imperfectly.  Pointing out to us where we may fall short, even from their innocence of figuring out the world around them.  Testing our patience, and revealing the cracks where we may not be as strong as we thought.  Helping us realize we may not be 100% yielded to Christ, and forcing us to our knees in prayer when life isn’t easy to fake our way through anymore.  Even more so when these events happen at 80 decibels in the cereal aisle of Kroger.  Parenting can be a humiliating endeavor…and as Christians – we embrace that as a positive thing.  Why?  Again…because humiliation leads us to a life that bears the fruit of humility.

So it’s with a bit of irony, and not always a helpful nod that so many Christian parenting books are about helping parents navigate these roads with less difficulty, more smooth sailing, and with control over their lives.  Instead of feeling pressure this week to “have it all figured out”, or “knowing the best way to do ______ with your children”….embrace the moments that make you feel humiliated as a parent.  Smile when your spouse shares a moment with you that you wouldn’t dare share with anyone else.  May God continue to be faithful as we turn to Him from where we are…:)

 

Fall has officially begun.  One of my favorite seasons, and here are just a few reasons why:

– You can wear hoodies and flip-flops at the same time.

– Jumping in leaves. (after someone else rakes them, of course)

– Bonfires!

– Trips to the Cider Mill! (or if you’re from IL, “Apple Orchard”)

– Pumpkin Flavored everything.

– The start of a new NHL season. (although this season makes me tear up a bit so far. 😦  )

– School-Year Routines (Youth Ministry becomes a bit more stable, even during the busy bits)

– New Seasons of ________ (what show are YOU excited about?)

– Putting away the lawn mower for the year.

– No air conditioning bills, and no need for heat yet either.

– One step closer to going sledding!!  (hoping we get more/any snow this year!)

– I thought it’d also be fun to share a video with you of Addie, from about 4 years ago.  We’ve come a long way!!  Why are you excited for the Fall???

I don’t think any of us need to hear another blog telling us about the evils of a particular politician or political party.  You don’t have to look far these days to find a new story or quote that’s being forwarded all over Facebook or Twitter, being “Liked” by thousands of people who don’t care enough to actually research the story before passing it on to all of their own friends.  I’ve heard people slam Romney (not many, admittedly in ministry circles), and many more still express their discuss for our President and his party.  It seems to be one of the few areas in life where prejudice is not only allowed, but embraced.  It’s socially acceptable for someone to make a sweeping statement about all people of a political party…even when that statement is not true, not loving, and not beneficial.

But realizing all of this – is nothing new.  Years ago, books were selling millions of copies that embraced the message that Jesus was not aiming toward partisan politics.  He was announcing the ways of a new system entirely – a Kingdom centered on Him and the Love of God.

The truth is, there are people who love Jesus who find themselves voting in many directions…and motivated by differing key issues.  Another important truth is – our children, not to mention thousands of people who are curious about Jesus – are paying attention to how we speak, what we type, and what we say when many of these issues arise.  This is not a time for us to use scripture out of context to bash another person or party.  The ways of world are to take unrelated facts, partial events, and half-truths and wield them as weapons to deflate and defeat the competition.

John 13:35 says, “By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.“

 or James 3:9-10, “With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in God’s likeness. Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers, this should not be.“

So what are we to do?

1. Seek Truth.  When you hear a quote, learn the context.  When you hear a story, seek more details.  Be very slow and cautious to use the “forward/share” button.  Try to see/hear it from an opposing perspective, and be willing to learn more.

2. Speak Hope.  So much of politicking is based in “cursing” those we disagree with.  Instead, focus on the Hope you have for the leaders you’re supporting.

3. Pray for our leaders.  Whether they’re “voted in” yet or not, if they’re speaking on a platform, they have leadership and influence.  Pray for them to have wisdom, humility, and to be the kind of leaders who reflect the image of God in how they lead.

4. Love.  Remember when DC Talk said it?  Love is a verb.  We cannot simply smile, believing that no matter what we say, we really do love all people deep down inside.  Love others, talk about what’s on your heart, and ask what is on theirs.  This is a great time of easily opened doors to conversations of depth that we often overlook or misuse by being partisan-minded.  Praying God would give you opportunity to Love on others ahead of time can be a big part of preparing for these moments. 🙂

My kids are young, and we don’t really talk much about “politics” at this point, other than praying for our leaders and teaching them some of their names.  What about your home?  How are you honoring Jesus while guiding your older children/teens through this election year and it’s often complex issues?