Tag: parenting

Posted in Uncategorized

“Frozen” Thawed…

Posted on by Wick

If you’re like me, you’ve had people fillin’ up your Facebook feed with how incredible this new Disney horror story, “Frozen” is.  Apparently a lot more people are into kids’ growing up without friends, experiencing the death of both parents, and men being intimate with reindeer than I realized.  A little girl realizes she’s a bit of a freak (I realize that’s harsh, but she hasn’t realized she’s a certain race/sexual preference/physically disabled/or whatever symbolism you wanted to give it……she’s realized she magically turns everything/everyone around her to ice.  THAT is freaky.), and to keep her and the world both safe, they’ve locked her up and taught her to keep her talent hidden.

Okay sure, the music is a bit catchy.  Until you realize that song you’re humming (Do you wanna build a snowman?) is the tune that told the story of two sisters being harshly separated, and containing a montage of scenes where their parents are both drowned off by Disney in an effort to force the story forward (such a force returns multiple times throughout the movie), leaving lonely girls in a dreary kingdom.   It’s silly that the credits even say “Based on (or Inspired by) ‘The Snow Queen’ by Hans Christian Anderson”.  The story has very little in common, beyond snow.

So I was content to “Let It Go” (pun intended) until this past week I was flooded with “likes” on this particular post, Frozen-movie-posterpraising the “subversive nature” of the movie.  Now I had to speak up.  Subversive?  Messages that teach my daughters how to be strong/healthy young women?  Let’s be honest, our kids aren’t paying attention to the underlying subversive psychologies hidden in the movie.  As my 3 daughters belt out the words from every song off the soundtrack (yup, we’ve got it), it’s obvious what messages they’ll be getting from this movie (beyond wanting freeze superpowers): The Songs.  Let’s take a moment and appreciate, one song at a time, how dangerous those messages are:

1. Frozen Heart – Okay this one is alright.  Although when they dance to it, my girls imagine themselves as masculine ice-cutters, swinging away their giant ice cutting devices to the rhythms.  Once again my point is made.  My daughters aren’t encouraged here to “break through” to any “frozen hearts”.  They’re encouraged to pretend they are ice harvesters.  Perhaps that IS subversive, as we all know how sexist the ice-harvesting industry can be.

2. Do You Want to Build a Snowman? – Point made above. And right when my girls “get into the song”, there comes a musical interlude where our 4 year old says, “This is where the mommy and daddy die, right dad?”  Thanks, Disney.  Nothing lifts spirits like hearing your daughters sing a song about being the sister who’s ignored.

3. For the First Time in Forever – How long before someone uses this song to make fun of homeschooled kids?  I do enjoy the confusion between being “elated or gassy”, though.  But it’s downhill from there, to a girl who can’t wait to meet “The One”, and hoping to be noticed by anyone to affirm her self-worth.  The song closes with her sister joining in, & seeds being planted about a future song bashing on self-control/temperence.  Can’t wait…

4. Love is An Open Door – Subversive indeed.  She meets a guy the first time she leaves the castle, and they fall instantly in love.  Such incredibly well-established love obviously opens the door to a life of bliss together…or at least, enough bliss to last the song.  Do we want daughters who get disappointed every time they leave the house, that they didn’t mean a man who swept them off their feet to music?  To look forward to finally finding the guy who will open up the life they’ve truly been waiting for?  That’s right….being single is nothing but a closed door, girls.

5. Let it Go – A song celebrating a lack of self-control, and celebrating being so far away from people you can do whatever you want without worrying about hurting them by being the horrible person you are.  Zero accountability means I can never do anything wrong, right?  Let my storm loose, and who cares about the consequences?  At least I’m being “who I really am”.

6. Reindeers Are Better Than People – Awkward animal-loving Hans, teaching our kids to distrust every other human being.  ‘Nuff said.

7. In Summer – Okay, so I actually love this song.  But my kids are learning to be horribly dishonest to talking snowmen as they snicker listening to it.  Someday that’ll come back to bite us.

8. For the First Time in Forever (reprise) – A sung dialogue where one sister finally understands her sibling, and offers her loving support.  Her sister refuses the help, and tells her to go away. “Dad, this is where she makes a snow monster, right?”  Once again…not behavior I’m wanting my kids to model.

9. Fixer Upper – Sure he walks funny, gets grumpy, has weird feet, smells gross, has a weird thing for reindeer, runs funny, and is socially impaired…but he’s sensitive and sweet!  And no matter that she’s already engaged to be married, as long as she’s not wearing a ring it’s insignificant.  A “little bit of love” is all you need to become blind to whatever is wrong.  The song even reminds us “people don’t really change”.

10. Let it Go – (Demi Lovatto version) Not even sure why this one was needed.  Perhaps to remind our older daughters who notice the difference, “Do anything you want like the princess, but understand that no matter how you do – they’ll eventually hire someone who can do it better.”  Nice.

So there ya’ go.  The actual soundtrack has a 2nd album with songs that didn’t make the cut, and lots of instrumentals.  But I think there’s enough to mess up our kids right there.  Sure, the story comes around to sisters loving each other, and warming hearts, and saying goodbye to the guy she thought was “The One” instead of gettin’ hitched. But none of those important bits of the movie are important enough to warrant a song….and thus….forgotten until next time they watch it.

Ps.  I mean very little of what I’ve said here.  I got carried away.  I think I just really love “Tangled” too much, although the music for Frozen is pretty darn catchy.  Can’t get it out of my head.  Almost….subliminal, actually.

Hmm…..

(PPS – If you really enjoyed “Frozen”, you may enjoy the post I wrote from the opposite perspective. Same exact approach. :))

Posted in Uncategorized

daddy worries.

Posted on by Wick

It was earlier this week, as we sat around the breakfast table, gathered around “Fruit Spins”, milk, and the advent wreath.  Last week we’d talked about “Hope”, and it was easy to talk to the girls about what we each were hoping for.  The poignant moment coming when it came to our 4 year old daughter, and she was hoping for “God”.  I asked her to clarify….”What do you hope God will do?”

She smiled and said proudly, “Whatever God wants to do!”  Here it is, ladies and gentlemen, the faith of a child. 🙂

So I was waiting this week, for what new nugget of wisdom my own kids were going to throw back at me as we moved into a week focusing on “Peace”.  But “peace” is a bit more complicated than “hope”.  So daddy decided to talk a little about why we need peace.  I asked the girls what they’re afraid of, and what makes them worry.  I received many of the expected responses:     monsters (no, not really, daddy), being sick, scary dreams, and “sometimes when I walk down the stairs and it’s dark in the middle of the night, I think maybe there are some animals coming down behind me who want to eat me.”

sophieDefinitely scary, and worth worrying about.  So we talked about peace, and then daddy decided to get down on their level, and talk about what makes daddy anxious/worried.  That’s when it hit me like a sack of bricks.  I covered it well, but I felt emotion in those moments that I don’t usually give word/time for.  The honest truth is this:

I worry about my family.  My wife.  My kids.  Every time I’m away from them, there’s that back of the mind “thing”.  I can’t wait to hold them again.  To be near them.  To know that they’re alright.  But even in the most peace-filled moments, I’m reminded by the world I’ve lived in so far – there’s no guarantee.  Even when Super-Dad is with them, my children, my wife, and my home are never 100% protected to the point where I have no reason to worry.  There’s always the chance of something unexpected happening.

I remember hearing the phrase growing up, “peace that passes understanding” (Philippians 4:7).  I would smile the silly smile of a young teen who’s confident this verse means no matter what happens in life we’re supposed to smile…to prove we’ve got some sort of “inner peace” that doesn’t make sense to the world.  But twice that age now, and having experienced quite a few situations where a smile is not the appropriate response – I’m thankful for the context to verse 7.

“Let your gentleness show in your treatment of all people.  The Lord is near.  Don’t be anxious about anything; rather, bring up all of your requests to God in your prayers and petitions, along with giving thanks.  Then the peace OF GOD that exceeds all understanding will keep your hearts and minds safe IN CHRIST JESUS.” Philippians 4:5-7 (emphasis added)

It’s not about me coming up with the ability to have peace in the midst of life circumstances.  It’s not about me never having a concern.  It’s centered on approaching every concern I have in the context of God, who can handle the big picture.  In the context of Christ being more than capable of keeping our hearts and minds safe.  I’m not to have peace because I have peace.  I’m to have peace because God has peace.

Not in a way that denies horrible things happen.  Because they certainly have, and do, and will.  Nor do we deny these horrible things will shake us to our core sometimes.  We will experience pain, and offense, and brokenness.  But the promise of peace still comes to us, in the presence of Jesus Christ.  The child born in a manger, in whom God proclaims to all of creation, us included, “I am with you.”

And in that….we receive God’s peace which transcends our understanding/abilities.

Posted in Different Learning

how the US is fighting world peace.

Posted on by Wick

A news update I’ve become aware of (that you may all already know, because you watch the news), concerns the future of the US and our World in a way that seems to matter.  “UNESCO” is the “United Nations Educational, Scientific, & Cultural Organization”.  It was launched many years ago under the premise that you do not bring peace about by enforcing a cessation of violence, but by developing minds and hearts together.  Literally “building peace in the minds of men and women”.  More specifically, it came together in the mid-40’s, “In their eyes, the new organization must establish the “intellectual and moral solidarity of mankind” and, in so doing, prevent the outbreak of another world war.”

unesco-sign-and-buildingSounds like a pretty important effort, right? One that we would not only want to join, but help be an influential voice within?  And we did.  Until 1984, when we left because UNESCO’s goals were found to be different from our own.  But in 2003, (after we were attacked horribly in 2001, and remembered why it’s important to connect hearts and minds globally), we rejoined.   President George W. Bush stated, “As a symbol of our commitment to human dignity, the United States will return to UNESCO. This organization has been reformed and America will participate fully in its mission to advance human rights and tolerance and learning.”  Ever since 2003, we’ve been a big part.  Even as recently as a few years ago, the US Contributions to the UNESCO budget made up over 22% of their operations.

They’ve done great work to connect the scientific developments across the globe.  Along with cultural education/sharing/protection, encouraging/promoting rights to eduction and especially of girls/women.  They do some pretty incredible and VERY important stuff – for more specifics, check out their report from last year. Education for children, power for powerless, food for hungry, etc.

So what’s the problem?

The problem is, back in 2011, UNESCO voted to allow Palestine participate as a nation.  That went against a 1990 US Policy that amounted to “If you invite _____ to the party, we’re not coming.”  At the time, some feared that it was a first step into crazy things like Palestine joining the UN.  I get it, as a group, Palestine definitely has problems with stability.  Some with long-standing land-conflicts..and some from the “Fatah vs. Hamas” conflict within.  I’m very limited in my knowledge/understanding, but I don’t like a lot of what I’ve learned about the Hamas side of things.  That being said…would I still want to invite them to a global conversation on how to better humanity around the world?  I think so?  After all, look at the list of nations who are part of UNESCO…we were cool sitting at a table with North Korea.

There was a grace period of a few years, where we had opportunity to keep our involvement/funding.  But now we’ve officially lost our “vote” as a part of UNESCO.  Whether it was just a final plea for our finances or not, the Director-General made some very powerful statements about why the US needs to stay connected to UNESCO.

So what’s my rant about?  I just think it’s important to note that most of the world disagrees with us on this one (in the 2011 vote, out of 159 nations, 13 sided with us).  That in order to protect “our own interests”, we’re actually modelling the very behavior that in the 1940’s we set out to combat.  That the “interests of humanity” worldwide must always be more important than the “interests of a nation”…if we’re to avoid roads of world war…or even continue living on this earth as the growing collective humanity that we are.

So how do we communicate all of this…something I hardly understand myself…to our children?  I’m not sure, but it starts with prayer.  “Thy Kingdom come, Thy will be done…”, not as interpreted by one nation…but for all.