Wick – Page 102 – words from wick

risqué blog title.

Posted on February 25, 2014 by Wick

This is where I tease you a bit, making you wonder if the blog I’ve written truly says what you think it might. It piqued your interest just enough, and the image that came with it connected with something you’ve either experienced, or recently heard about. It’s probably pretty important. Or something so excruciatingly vital, you’re not sure how you lived without such knowledge. This is where you begin to wonder if perhaps I’ve tricked you into reading something you completely agreed with already. This is where I drag one point out just a little too long, possibly throwing in a vague quote by an author you might perceive as inflammatory. But not inflammatory enough to make you stop reading. Possibly even….educational? Inspirational?

This sentence, right here. Rather, this one, is just edgy enough to make you gasp audibly. As this happens, you wonder if now would be a good time to “share” the article so that you’ll be the first among your friends to do so. You decide to read a bit more first, playing it safe. After all, we all remember that one time you “shared” that one article that didn’t exactly say what you thought it did at first glance. As it turns out, playing it safe was a good move, because you seriously begin to wonder if this article says much of anything beyond what you already believed. But then, it happens.

Like. Never. Before.

Yup, I pull a twist of the English language and revelatory emotion that makes you jump 10 feet out of your literary comfort zone. But now you’re too hooked to even think about leaving my site to share it with your friends. Yet. Of course, it’s still there in the back of your mind. And “liking” it, of course. But now you’re diving deep into my words, my powerful prose has captured your imagination, and begun to even tug at your heart. You wonder why you haven’t put these words together like this before….once it’s written, it seems so incredibly obvious. But then again, it wasn’t obvious, was it? Your friends are going to love this post. This deserves to be read by everyone who really “gets” what you’re thinking about lately. Or should, at least. But wait…there’s one more thing to do.

You click the “comment” button. Because you know many of your friends will end up reading/commenting/sharing this article as well. You want them to see that you’ve taken the time to let these words simmer in the midst of your day, and offer a slight contribution to the article. Nothing trollish, but nothing as simple as a verbal “nod of the head” either. Something with weight, but nothing that’s going to blow up your feed with responses. As you sit there pondering, blank ready to be filled, you realize how much pressure you feel in this moment. You decide the value of your time is much more than the value from one comment. After all, people will all post their responses on your facebook anyway…not here.

So you quietly let go of the need to post a contributional comment. You copy the URL at the top, and click over to your social network of choice. Posting a quick update, you announce to all who might follow your activities, “I’ve read this, and think it was worth sharing.” Instantly, 30% of your friends feel the tug on their moment and think to themselves “Whoa…I should probably check that out.” Some of them will. A new conversation will begin on your social network of choice that adds local and intimate flavor to the topic.

I will smile. Thanks for reading. 🙂

giving God our scrapple.

Posted on February 21, 2014February 21, 2014 by Wick

We were on vacation, and Sarah had found the restaurant using one of them hip-trendy restaurant-finder Apps. It was ranked #1 in the area, so we knew anything on the menu was going to knock it out of the park. As we looked over the choices, we realized the reason it was so highly ranked was probably because they served just about everything you could imagine. Among the choices, there were several options I’d never heard of. Always the adventurous type, I decided to take a chance:

Me: Hmm, so what is this “Scrapple”?

Waitress: Well, you know how hotdogs are made out of the leftovers of meat? Scrapple is made out of the scraps leftover after hotdogs are made. Absolutely nothing goes to waste. Then they add some cornmeal, and season it up. I grew up eating it.

Me: Sounds great. I’ll take some.

My stomach an hour later: (shaking it’s fist at me) Whhhyyyyyyy!!!!!????

You know what would’ve been great for breakfast that morning? Ham. Yeah, ham definitely would’ve been awesome. I think God knew that as a people, we’d become more and more okay with serving our “lastfruits” not only as an item for breakfast, but as our worship and sacrifice to Him. We have the commitments we’ve made with each day, whether work or home or play, and somewhere in between all the important stuff, if we really love him, we’ll carve out a few minutes for a devotional or Bible reading.

We’ll stay out/up late Saturday night doing whatever we want, make plans for Sunday afternoon, and feel great about shoving the family in the van – everyone too tired to know exactly what’s going on. Blurry eyed, we’ll make it through service, check “Sabbath” off our list, and make it to lunch/etc. just in time.

Or the one I’m most guilty of, we’ll arrange our finances. Make commitments for a lifestyle that fits the American Dream in our context, and with whatever’s left we’ll try to get close to 10%….or something…to give as our offering to God.

I say all of this not as a pastor trying to bring guilt on other church-goers, but as a fellow scrapple-server, realizing I want to give God ham. (I realize the irony in serving God what was traditionally an “unclean animal”…oh well.) I want to give God the first moments of my day, when my brain is firing well. I want to give God my focus and energy as if communion with the body of Christ at the banquet table of His Word is the most important aspect of my Sabbath. I want to give to God sacrificially, making choices to deny myself bits of “The American Dream”, so that I can experience the blessings of being completely yielded to Him.

But instead so many times I offer him my scrapple. I give to him whatever I’ve got left after I’ve cut out the bits and pieces I really needed for other things. I’m so incredibly thankful for His grace, and the smile on His face. As he takes the plate from me, and looks down at what I offer. He loves what I’ve given. He eats my scrapple. He gently reminds me of the pattern He set, offering the very best to us. He hasn’t left the table…but waits with a loving smile, expectantly….(Proverbs 3:9)

Adoption Journey, Uncategorized

Adoption and Men…

Posted on February 13, 2014February 12, 2014 by Wick

When entering the “world” of adoption conversations, especially when you connect to a blog/Facebook group/other online conversation, you’ll quickly notice the primary voices are women. Certainly God uses “a mothers heart” in many cases, and speaks into a family through the bride. In other times, it might be the “fathers heart” that He uses to tug toward adoption. But even in cases where the couple is equally engaged/pulled toward reaching out to the orphan, most often it seems the mother is the one “out there” with the topic, connecting with others and having conversations about the process. There are a few reasons that stand out as to why this may be happening:

1. Adoption involves a lot of emotion. Like, gobbs. The waiting, the picture updates, how far away this child is from you physically, etc. And as we all know, emotions are for women. (tongue in cheek) Even as young boys, men are trained to have Jedi-like control over their emotions. When someone is being “emotional”, we instantly feel they’re not being “manly”…whatever that might mean. So even though a man may feel it, they’ll probably keep most of it to themselves. There’s also a big chance, that even though they care deeply about what’s happening, they don’t have the words or the need to put into words all they’re feeling. That’s because…

2. Men easily compartmentalize. “The amygdala is a part of the brain that controls our emotional responses. In men, the amygdala communicates with just a few parts of the brain, like the visual cortex and part of the brain responsible for movement. (source: Lloyd) It’s like the amygdala is a power strip, and men have just one appliance plugged in. In comparison, a woman’s power strip is fueling many different appliances. In women, the amygdala is more connected to parts of the brain that control language, which may be why women talk about their feelings. It’s also linked to parts of the brain that control bodily functions like heart rate, blood pressure and digestion, which may be why women get a stomachache or other bodily response when they’re stressed or worried. In comparison, men seem to compartmentalize and show no outward display of emotion. But men still experience all the same emotions that women do, they just don’t cope with them in the same way.” (stolen from a science-ish website)

3. Adoption is much more emasculating than men realize when they “sign up” for it. It’s sounds like the great plot for a manly story. “Man helps his family reach out to the other side of the world, where a young child is in need of rescue, he helps bring them home and increases the size and heart of his own family (Christians add here “in the name of Jesus”).” It’s totally a “knight in shining armor” type thing. But then the journey actually begins. He realizes he doesn’t have the finances to do it alone, and has to go around asking others to help. He’s told by the agency “All of those natural fatherly desires you have to go and do whatever it takes to help your case move forward and bring your child home? Let ’em go. We represent you, and it’s in the best interest of everyone for you to let us do so.” It’s probably true. With the amount of extortion and corruption trying to seep into international adoptions, it’s really good to have people with experience and dedication to what’s best for the nation and children.

With these elements, and many more being thrown into the mix…our responses are important:

Wives – Understand the differences about how this adoption process impacts you and your husband. Offer grace when he doesn’t seem geeked out about gushing his adoptive emotions over coffee. Love him by asking specific questions, give him time to respond…and don’t expect a book. Pray with him. Help him connect whatever part of the process you’re in to his manly quest. Sure, he may not be able to ride over there on a horse and scoop up your child – but he can certainly put on his shining armor and head out to the fingerprints office. Be thankful that he can breathe slow and steady when you feel all out of sorts, and how God’s heart is reflected in such steadiness.

Husbands – Understand the differences about how this adoption process impacts you and your wife. Offer grace when it seems she’s carrying a giant heavy burden…because she is. When seemingly out of nowhere, she tells you how hard it is to endure all of this, and wonders if you even care. This is your chance to be as manly as you were hoping you could be. Not by rescuing your child just yet…but by scooping up your wife. Reassure her. Pray with her. Use that focused amygdala to your advantage, and let her cry on your shoulder. Dig deep into the compartment of adoption emotions and try to communicate what you’re feeling to her. Be thankful for the depths of her emotions, and see how Gods’ heart is reflected in their mystery and force.

Share the Love:

Share the Love:

Share the Love: