Author: Wick

“Daddy…sometimes I whisper to myself.” she said to me, timidly.

“Oh yeah?” I say back, smiling.  “What do you say?”  She motions for me to come close, so she can whisper in my ear.

In a soft whisper she reveals to me an amazing capacity for depth I don’t usually give my 5 year old credit for.  “Is this really happening?”

I tried not to look too surprised.  “You wonder if things are real?”  She smiled shyly and nodded.  We talked a bit about the differences between dreams and reality, and things that are pretend and things that are real.  She reassured me that she knew what was real, but that sometimes she just wants to make sure.  Whispering to herself helps.

I remember taking intimidating philosophy/theology classes in college.  I had a great professor who was known for guiding students toward thinking, writing, and speaking about the big questions (and some small ones that were added just for fun).  I didn’t get remarkable grades in that class, but I saved every one of my papers.  Some of my first moments asking difficult questions happened in those classes, and I was introduced to a Jesus I’d never known existed before.  The encouraging words written by that professor meant even more than the less-than-impressive letter grade.
This past Sunday I was reminded of a misunderstanding, or rather, a missed blessing I had back in those college theology days.

Philippians 2:12 says: “Therefore, my dear friends, as you have always obeyed—not only in my presence, but now much more in my absence—continue to work out your salvation with fear and trembling,”

Throughout college, because of the pressure to not answer a question incorrectly or seem to be “out of the loop” theologically – but most of all because I was finally grasping the awesome and dangerous thing called “putting God into words”, I’d always read these verses as a warning to not dance lightly through the task of understanding God.  To not take him for granted.  To not have bad theology from an uninformed reading of scripture.  To work out my salvation “in fear in trembling” largely meant to be cautious so as to not get something wrong.

Obviously I hadn’t read Kierkegaard as closely as I should have.  (although I did really enjoy “Works of Love”, and taste it like an everlasting gobstopper that still hasn’t gone bad sometimes still today.)

As any follower of Christ who has children must realize at one point or another – the “fear and trembling” is not only from the risk of misunderstanding who God is.  Not only about “what if I get something wrong?”  There is a fear and trembling that can be just as threatening…

What if we get it right?

What if we do actually understand the words of God, and the calling of Christ, and it compels us to live sacrificially?  To open up our homes, and our selves to loving the world around us in ways that make us vulnerable/less powerful/less popular/less…?  To pray to God “I will follow you”, and hear him ask us to travel to Nineveh. (sorry…we watched Veggietales “Jonah” this past week)

And so, as my daughters waved their palm branches this past Sunday, declaring Jesus as Lord – I prayed.  I continue to pray.  My fear and trembling now goes beyond me.  What will Jesus ask of my daughters?  It’s not a fear and trembling that makes us choose another road.  In fact, God gives us examples of this fear and trembling in our lives.  As we stand before the minister, saying our vows (What sacrifices will this lead me into?).  As we stand at the OB during an ultrasound (What sacrifices will this lead us into?).

In the same way…each of us approaches our journey with God in humility.  Not only because this is God we’re talking about, but because this God is also speaking to us…:)

It will happen on a pretty regular basis.  Our kids will accomplish something along these lines:

– balancing a book on their head.

– pulling up their pants all by themselves.

– being able to throw 3 scarves up in the air, so that they all “explode” in colors on the way down.

– climbing to the top of…well…anything.  A couch, a chair, a table, a bed, or an inflatable toy. 🙂

At the moment of completion, they begin to yell as they announce their accomplishment to the world.  It usually happens when we’re involved in one task or another, and so the announcement also comes as a plea for attention:  Daaaaad!!?  Daa-aadddd-eeeeee??!!  Daaayaaaddddeeeeee!!!!??   Loooook Daaaaddd!!?

It doesn’t take much usually, although we parents like to give more than a smile or a nod.  We love to help them celebrate their accomplishment, grab them into the air and twirl around with giant smiles on both our faces!  After all, they actually did it!!!

We know that if it didn’t mean much to them, the moment would have just passed.  And I’m with Dr. Leman, we’re not simply to  congratulate and celebrate every false accomplishment so our kids think they’re “winners” at everything.  But that’s in regard to figuring out the talents and gifts of children as they age.  My daughter isn’t at risk of thinking she can go on to become a scarve-throwing artist for the rest of her life…(although I’m sure the Cirque Du Soleil people get paid fairly well).

But it did matter.  Their eyes looked up from the task at hand, searching for affirmation and love.  Yearning to be celebrated.  We give it to them, because we’re their parents and it’s not simply our “job”, but it is the rhythm of our hearts.  When our hearts beat with this rhythm, we share the heartbeat of God.  One of my wife’s favorite verses continues to grow on me:

“The LORD your God is with you, he is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing.” Zephaniah 3:17

God takes delight in us, even in the things that are not what the world would consider incredible accomplishments.  Even in the things the “church” may not consider an incredible accomplishment.  That tiny bit of love offered to a stranger.  That small act of repentance, turning away from yourself and toward Him/others.  That sacrificial act that passed in the blink of an eye, and you’re not sure if anyone saw it….or if it counted for much.  We look with yearning eyes to our Father, and He comes to lift us up with Joy pouring out of His expression.  As He twirls us around in the air, He reaffirms His love for us, and reminds us that in moments like these – the Kingdom is breaking through.  We are encouraged to continue living a life full of these seemingly “tiny things” that are actually kind of a big deal….