Posted in Different Moments, Different Thoughts

Bob Evans & the Bear

Our oldest daughter turned 6 this past week, and the thought that continues to light up in my head is a quote from Dr. Leman’s book “It’s Your Kid, Not  A Gerbil“.  Something to the effect of by the time our kids turn 6 years old, we’re 1/3 done with having our time with them at home.  It’s definitely a thought that has me grabbing at moments with her, and breathing through them slowly and with purpose.

This morning was just such an occasion.  Bob Evans generally sends my kids a birthday card (because we’re friends with Bob), good for a free kids meal.  That’s usually a reminder to take my daughter out for a daddy/daughter date for her birthday.  We talk about the previous year, and I tell her the Bible verse I pray for her on a regular basis, and for the year to come.  This year the card never came, and awesome father that I am, I didn’t make plans without getting a “free meal” card in the mail.  Thankfully, my wife reminded me we can eat there even without the free meal card.   Silly me. 🙂

As we walked in, the waitress said she’d be right with us.  But Addie, being the incredibly mature 6 year old she is…asked if we could sit at the bar where we could watch the kitchen/etc.  I said sure, so we hopped over and sat down, talking with Cathy the coffee lady.  She proudly announced that:  1. We were celebrating her birthday.  2.  She had a loose tooth, and the tooth-fairy was totally going to pay up.  She ordered the expected chocolate chip pancakes made into a creepy looking smile (the bacon was placed like a giant nose, instead of the eye-brows), washed down with a chocolate milk.  I followed suit with my predictably cheap “a la carte” biscuits and sausage gravy…though I did splurge on an expensive mug of coffee.   (Sidenote: it only comes with two biscuits….why offer me honey and jam also?  Like I’m gonna eat the gravy as soup?)

The neat moment came when an older gentleman sat next to my daughter, and began his obviously normal routines.  The waitresses knew him, and affectionately referred to him as “Bear”.  He joined us in conversation at one point, asking my daughter if she had any pets.  I was probably too proud, when she responded “Yes, we have chickens!!”, which he was a bit surprised by.  Then he told her she had a doggy too, at which point she and I were both a bit confused.  We definitely do not have a doggy.  But using a piece of paper, he laid her hand down and gently, as an obviously trained grandfather would, traced an outline of her thumb.  He then added the face, ears and collar.  There, see?  She had a dog right in her hand.   He then wrote the word “D-O-G” on paper, and asked her to read it.  She passed the test.  Then he told her to use the same letters, and wrote “G-O-D”, and asked her to read that.  She smiled and said confidently, “God.”  He smiled at her, looked at me, and back to her said, “And you know what?  God made little doggies, and he made you too!”  She smiled in agreement, and he told her she could take the drawing home to color and show her sisters.  We each finished our meals as Bear told us a little about his many grandchildren.

Thank you Bear.  May more and more people enjoy the experience of your thumb-drawings and spelling lesson.  It wasn’t theologically heavy, and didn’t need to be.  It wasn’t selling her heaven, or offering safety from hell.  It was simply a message revealing God on her level.  May each of us live in a way that recognizes how much we can reinforce the messages of God’s Love for others on a regular basisEspecially at unexpected moments like this.

Posted in Different Moments

different children.

Today we experienced the beauty of each child’s individuality once more.  These are always fun moments.


You’ll notice in the picture, each girl is busy at the task of painting a ceramic item they’ve chosen out.  This picture was taken quite a ways into our time painting.

Ruby is hard at work painting however she sees fit.  She’s decided to make this an imaginative pink car, and wants to make sure every inch of this car is covered in it brightly.  She’ll go over the same spot several times, just watching the brush strokes, and enjoying the motions of getting more paint onto her brush….as well as rinsing it away in the water again.  Don’t forget to watch the water itself, as each brush dipped makes it a cloudy new color!

Sophie is also hard at work, painting as many objects as possible while creatively using as many colors as possible.  She loves to leave spots of white, because it’s “white paint” that has already been done for her!  She looks around the room to see if there are other options for colors she hasn’t been able to use yet, and her brush goes quickly from paint, to object, to water, and back to a new color of paint again.  Mommy, can I go get another object to paint??

Addie, of course, is still only a small ways into  her project.  She’s decided to paint a beautiful brown horse, just like she’s seen in photographs.  She’s taking short, carefully placed strokes filled with the perfect amount of paint, ensuring that the horse itself looks like it just jumped out of a picture.  She has already asked mom if she’ll help when she reaches the face, to make sure she adds a “white spot” just like some horses have.  She thinks about what this horse might enjoy doing, and breathes slowly to make sure it doesn’t jostle her brush too much.  This is artistic detail. 🙂

I love our daughters, and can’t wait to get to know the unique-ness of the one we haven’t met yet. 🙂

Posted in Different Moments

Why I No Longer Believe.

When I was growing up, it was all a lot easier. You kinda just followed the adults that were in your life. They “created” the way things were. No reason to ask questions. No reason to rock the boat. Nothing to question.

It became a pattern. It was a part of life on such a daily basis that I never really thought much about it. Day in, day out, it was almost like breathing or eating. Something you just do, not something to think about or analyze.

Then in youth group age even, I became blindly optimistic. I actually DID think about it, and still it made sense. Made sense to the point where I became passionate about it. I got to the point where I thought I knew what I was talking about. I told other people how THEY should think. I told my perspective and my thoughts simply because I couldn’t understand why anyone would ever think/believe differently. My youth pastor had given me a Wednesday night to speak to the group, and it was part of my entire message that night. Looking back, I’m sorry for those I neglected to love.

Then I went to college. It seemed to be a “free for all” there. Sure, you’d meet some people who would back up your beliefs, but over-all…who knew what anyone actually lived by. People in college just want you to know how cool they are without trying to be cool. How trendy or hip they are. There are some that would deny any belief in it just because belief of this type was thought to be “childish” or “unnecessary”.

Then I graduated college…and entered the “adult” world. The world where it seemed to matter less and less on a regular basis. Once in a while it would still come up. I’m a youth pastor, so you can imagine it would come up sometimes. But overall, on the regular grocery shopping, mall walking, movie watching kinda days…nothing.

Then I became a father. I looked forward to sharing this with my family. To talk with my daughters as they continued to grow and develop an understanding of the world around them. But recently something changed. Something happened. I had a 2 year old.

I no longer believe that toilet paper has to face towards you, coming up from closest to the wall. Because when you do this, 2 year olds can just swat the heck out of it, making the toilet paper spool completely onto the floor.

I guess it’s okay to turn the roll around. Sigh.